Congratulations, Old-Timer-preneurs Club!
Who knew that the best cheerleadering team in Brownsburg was filled with mature, old, idle businessmen? Your rally cries for industrial development have been heard across every antiquated social media platform in the land! The faith you have in Town government to use tax revenue responsibly is quite the leap, and you have gone all in by risking your own life-long business reputations with the "Warehouses are Good" position. Your Town Council spirit never waivers, even as your public arguments fail. Here are just a few examples that you have shared with the public as to why warehouses are good for Brownsburg:
- To avoid higher taxes for citizens - Unfortunately, Brownsburg 2024 taxes will not support this claim.
- To balance the tax base - The dozens of congested planned developments that have been approved in conjunction with every industrial tax abatement do not support this claim. The new Unified Development Guidelines are bringing forth even more opportunities for maximizing residential development to keep Brownsburg in a constant state of unbalance.
- To bring good-paying jobs to Brownsburg - Tax abatements were distributed based on average pay of $30 per hour. Do tell us where this exists in Brownsburg warehouses for the active employees in the building! Or was this granted based on pay levels when abatements would expire in 2033?
- To support your Delusions of Influence - You do seem to think that Town Council will support your ideas the same way that you have supported theirs. So, as you campaign on how irresponsible it is to spend tax revenue on an aquatic center, they are now hosting public meetings to garner support for an aquatic center. Harsh.
We do hope that others will show pity as you enthusiastically bring the megaphone to every social media post by citizens trying to have an honest discussion about the future of Brownsburg. Your vigorous and very long spirit chants to control the rhetoric that future developers can see may not be appreciated by them, but we Visionaries understand its value! And no one can compete with the amount of free time that you have to chatter and troll. Keep fiesty and carry on, OTC!
You also love to tell tales mansplaining the legal journey of those unvisionary citizens who challenged the Town in court for not following their own guidelines. Our only critique is that you infuse so much monotony and pedantic rambling into your long narratives that it takes all the suspense out of the story. To balance this out, please enjoy this dramatization from Law & Order Brownsburg *dun-dun*:
Bailiff: All rise! The honorable Judge So-and-so presiding.
Judge: Brownsburg... you are here again with the claims that you are not following your own Land Use Map on the Town's Comprehensive Plan, the Unified Development Guidelines for appropriate adjacent districts, the 2018-2022 Strategic Plan AND the Ronald Reagan Corridor Master Plan. What say you?
Town Lawyer: Your Honor, some of those living documents are over a whole year old! They are way too dated to follow with all that stale "responsible development" nonsense. How can these documents keep up with all the side deals these Town Council members are making with landowners before they annex? And this Town Council doesn't listen to anyone unless their name starts with an "S" and ends with a "taton", so no pieces of paper are going to tell them what they can and cannot do!
Judge: Are you admitting that the Town government knowingly disregarded their own governing documents?
Town Lawyer: Oh, Judgey-poo, that fact is now irrelevant. The Town has already fast-tracked changes to all of their governing documents to let any developer do whatever they want! If we lose this case, we will just start over tomorrow with our brand new pro-industrial maps, plans and guidelines with no size limitations in place. Suck it, you unvisionaries!!!
Judge: I guess I have no choice. Case dismissed.
Now, some unvisionaries have assumed that your OTC pro-warehouse cheers are because you are self-serving favor seekers for your redevelopment businesses or your land sales to Town government. That would just be absurd... or absurdly accurate. Who cares? Just know that your reputations are now forever linked to the success of the Vision, and we thank you.